Security and dating sites

14 August 2015

Security and dating sites

With the growing popularity of online dating sites comes inevitably the growing popularity of scams that may be encountered in trying to meet your soul mate on the web. Here is a short portrait that perhaps could save yourself some trouble.

To men who may not feel concerned by this post: women are not the only victims of such scams, quite the contrary. In fact, according to some sources, men would be more often scammed than women on these dating sites. Women, meanwhile, have more precautions to take during first meetings. Let’s start first by addressing the former (scams on the dating sites), and then discussing the latter (precautions to take during first meetings) thereafter.
There are several different types of scams dating sites, but here are the most popular:

• A person you are interested in – it’s more often than not a female profile – gets your confidence, sends you great pictures of her, shares the same interests as you (in other words, the ideal candidate who shows out just like that, out of nowhere). The conversation is going well but suddenly the person is having computer or Internet issues , and asks you to call her to resume the discussion. There is a very good chance that the phone number she’s asking you to call to is a surcharged phone number (besides, when you do call that person, you reveal your phone number);
• Another person (or worse, the same!) gets your confidence, and proceeds telling you how bad her financial situation is (always for a myriad of good reasons), and then tries to draw your sympathy by showing you her very depressed state of mind. Rather strange behavior for someone you have not even met yet, isn’t it ? And yet, many people – especially men – fall for it and accept, with good intentions, to make funds transfers or to send money to this type of person;
• It is also recommended to users seniors to be cautious, because it still happens that younger users are looking for an older person with a good income, just to abuse of his money.

These scams are common on these sites, but keep in mind that there are several other types as well. While you can’t foresee everything, some security measures can help you: for example, you should create a mail box specifically for your dating site account – do not use the one you use frequently! Also, as best as possible, avoid giving your phone number. This will help protect your identity. Finally, never talk about money on these sites (in fact, you should avoid talking about money on the web in general). When a person who knows pratically nothing about you asks you for money, you should consider this as a warning signal. It is best to listen to your instinct: if you think something is wrong, it is that there is something wrong!

Regarding security measures to be taken during the first meeting with someone they met on the web, here they are:

• Before the appointment, share photos and talk with the person you plan on meeting via the camera. This will allow you to determine whether the person is as he described, and you will prevent a nasty surprise at the meeting;
• Insist to meet the person in a public place, and that to make that meeting brief – sharing a coffee in a restaurant is enough, and keeps you from spending too much to invite someone (paying several restaurant meals is expensive! ) and allows you to quickly shorten the meeting if there is a problem;
• Have someone in your entourage be aware of where you are going and who you plan on meet, and the time that the meeting is expected to last. Get to the meeting point by your own means :avoid at all costs to have that person you meet picking you up at your place in order to preserve your privacy;
• Be honest and understanding: If, once at the rendez-vous, the person does not appeal you and you prefer not to pursue your relation with him, polietly let that person know. You also risk less by saying it in a public place. If, however, the other person were to not be uninterested in your person, be understanding and do not insist.

So here you go: the watchwords are safety and patience! Trust your instincts, follow the steps and do not disclose personal information until several appointments.

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